Marriage Tip of the Day:

Husbands, as mature men of God, we must assume our roles of leadership in order to stabilize the home. No matter how much conflict is in your homes at the moment, your wives are looking to you for leadership. When I say lead, I don’t mean dominate. You lead by aligning yourself with God’s will for your life; by honoring your wife. Engage your wife with a love and gentleness, that is expressive of your faith. Let the reflection of Christ be seen by your wife first, because your wife will be the ultimate reflection of you. 1 Corinthians 11:7 says that woman is the glory of man. This means that she is his greatest accomplishment; she is the greatest reflection of who is. I once asked one of my spiritual mentors what he thought of new minister that had just joined the church. He said, “I’m not sure, I have not met his wife yet.” He told me that if you want to judge the character of a man observe the countenance of his wife. Her eyes will reflect his gentleness, and her smile will reflect his love and honor. Men, your wives are observing your every action, looking for confirmation of your love. It is your responsibility to make it easy for her to see.

 

Wives, your strength and fortitude is exceptional. No one has the power to affirm a man and help him to activate and actualize his potential in the manner and magnitude that his wife does. This also means she has the greatest potential to tear him down. Wives, your husbands, though they boasts a tough exterior, are extremely vulnerable to you. They thrive off of respect, adoration and reverence. They need to be affirmed and respected. When these things are absent, or worse; irreverence, disrespect, and contempt are present, it will cause your husband to shut down, become defensive and behave unloving. Behind every good man is a great woman. Why is she great? She is great because she is aware of his weaknesses, but instead of exploiting them, degrading him, and berating him, she comes along side of him and girds him. In doing this, she gives him the strength and confidence to function is his God-ordained design. Ladies, your husband needs to have the confidence that his home is his refuge. He needs the confidence to be vulnerable without being exploited and deprecated. He needs permission to be imperfect without being judged. I promise you that the benefits will be multitudinous. Proverbs 12:4 says, “An excellent (worthy, noble) wife is the crown of her husband…”. What are you?

Dr. Rick Wallace

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